Wordy Wednesday: A State of Confusion

I have always had cats. When I was about 8 we got our first one - TJ. Well...I think it could more accurately be described, that he chose us. Our next, Bootsie, was a rescue. And then she slept in our nativity set over Christmas. And shortly after had her own immaculate conception - and we now had Bootsie and her daughter, Tiggy. Then we adopted two farm cats - Ivan and Cindy. Next, Buddy, a stray, adopted my dad. When Michael and I moved in together we rescued Frannie and Zoe. Then a feral cat had five kittens under our deck. That we took in. And got them shots. And fixed. And really high vet bills for Tar-jay, Sweet pea, Baby, Katie (guess who named this one!), and Todd.

13 cats have been a part of my life. Todd the hermit cat still lives under my mom's bed. And then at the end of July, we brought two more cats hooligans - Jessie and Ella - into our lives. You'd think that after 13 cats - all of them being with us since they were very young - we would know what to expect. But these two. Well...I just think they are crazy. And confused.

Sometimes I think that they were circus performers in a previous life.

Or perhaps a spider.

Guerillas. In a war against napkins.

A roach. As they flatten themselves to micro inches to fit under furniture.

Stealth fighters.

Potted plants.

A Roman Emperor.

Or a very tired Mommy Blabber.

Sometimes, they act more like magpies. As they steal shiny bits. Like cell phones. Watches. Earrings. Shoes with buckles. Or cups from my bathroom sink. Nothing is sacred from their desire to hoard.

But most of the time. I just think the kitties think that they are dogs. They like to drink from the toilet. Sometimes they'll get a bit more high brow. Because they can turn on the faucet.They really like a good game of fetch. Just about anything will work. They like kitty toys. Stuffed animals will do the trick. My personal favorite is the heavy silver lever you use to flush the toilet. Yeah. They got that off the toilet and like to carry it around. I can attest that it is not fun for it to be "clunked" on you in the middle of the night when they want to play fetch.

But the biggest problem with kitties that think they are dogs. Well...it's chewing. They have ruined blinds.

Crocs. And anything that they can find. They have eaten most of their kitty toys. Soft mice with leather tails are now tail-less. Feathers at the end of a plastic circle. Well...feathers are devoured. The plastic circle. I have found bits of it around the house.

And the kitties most recent adventure was to eat a bunch of foam letters and numbers that the kids used to play with in the tub.

You know. Foam and kitties don't mix well. Foam forms a cork in the intestines.And causes kitties to have intestinal surgery. Requiring staples. And vet bills that look more like mortgage payments.

So...what about you? Did/do you like to pretend to be something that you are not? Has it ever taken you to the hospital? Are your pets struggling with identity as well? Do you have a favorite song that is a re-make/cover?

Theme song: Violent Femmes - Crazy. Because they are just as confused. Thinking that they are Gnarles Barkley.