Flotsam and Jetsam

I had to take the devil kitties to the vet this week for their first check up. Our reputation preceeded us. The receptionist at the vet knew exactly who I was making an appointment for. Along with their medical history. We might have been responsible for her last raise.

I got to meet another blogger for the first time last week. Kelly from Song for Whoever was in town on her momcation. And we had a fabulous afternoon together. Filled with yummies from Red Robin. Sonic Happy Hour. And a visit to Barnes and Noble. I love when I can suggest books to people. And Kelly bought four books that I suggested. Including "The Time Traveler's Wife." I love that book. And I can't wait to see the movie version next month.

My birthday was Saturday. And even though her life is a little on edge right now, Lizzy came for the weekend. I did leave her at home to bake my cake while Katie and I went to see Harry Potter. I keep hearing people say that they left things out. Or put things in that weren't in the book. But...it's been so long since I read the book...none of that stood out for me. But I will say that there were a lot of funny parts to it.

One of my favorite parts about going to the movies. Besides a bucket of popcorn bigger than me. Is the previews. When we saw "The Hangover" I was rather disappointed in the previews. They were mostly horror type movies. Like "Orphan." (And can you believe that people are protesting this movie? Do you think that people would base their decision to adopt or not on this movie?) But Harry yielded some very cool previews. Like for "Percy Jackson and the Olympians." Oh...February seems a long way away. And then. We saw the preview for "Sherlock Holmes." Oh my. I know how I am going to spend my Christmas day.

Speaking of movies. We got "Transformers" from netflix and watched it last night. It was much better than I thought it would be. And that entire scene with the robots trying to hide on the lawn was hysterical. So. Who has seen the sequel? Is it worth paying theatre prices to see?

So...what about you? Met any bloggers recently? Seen any good previews? Anticipating any movies?

Hangover causes Kidney stones?

It is a glorious day indeed. My children are old enough to go to the movies by themselves. While Michael and I go to a grown up movie in the theatre next door. I don't need a babysitter. I don't have to pay evening prices. And I don't have to share my popcorn. Glorious.

Last Thursday, we packed the kids off to see "Imagine That" while we went to see "The Hangover." A decidedly grown up offering. I spent the movie with my hands over my mouth. Slackjawed. In silent laughter. With tears running down my face. And a truly "OMG!" sentiment.

But after we got home. I had this sudden pain in my back. That curled around to my waist. It was a very intense pain. And it came to party with its friend nausea. It was not fun. Not at all. I somehow managed to sleep a little. And when I woke up, the pain was gone...but in its place was just an achy feeling.

Friday morning, the pain had returned. With gusto. And I completely abandoned my family. And Lizzy. And her family. Who had come to visit for the weekend. For the lovely confines of the local emergency room. I somehow managed to arrive at that split second that must happen. That second when NO ONE else was at the emergency room. No one. The parking lot was empty. The waiting room was empty. And I was taken right back.

I saw the doctor rather quickly. A Dr. Ghandi. Who told me that I had all the classic signs of kidney stones. I had a CT scan. And then they started IV drugs to deal with the pain. Oh the drugs. They were most lovely. They erased the pain. The nausea. And made me rather sleepy.

So I slept. And found out exactly how long I could go in between pain meds before I started reenacting scenes from "Terms of Endearment." ("It's past ten. My daughter is in pain. I don't understand why she has to have this pain. All she has to do is hold out until ten, and IT'S PAST TEN! My daughter is in pain, can't you understand that! GIVE MY DAUGHTER THE SHOT!" - Except that I am speaking for myself. And about a pill. Nevermind...)

And poor Lizzy. I was such a good host. It's a good thing that she comes so often. That she knows how to fend for herself. And she even did her own experiement by going with Mr. B to see "The Hangover." They escaped the kidney stone bonus track.

So that was how I spent my 4th of July. In Vicodin induced haze. Kinda like a hangover. Though I haven't seen any tigers or chickens around the house.

So...what about you? Have you seen "The Hangover?" Ever had a kidney stone? Do anything fun on the fourth?

Kitties, dinosaurs, and tornados. Oh my.

It is really the kittie's fault. The trouble that those two get into. They work as a team. One follows the other. One is the lookout while the other opens the drawers to my jewelry box. One works on popping the closet door open. While the other rushes in to steal crocs. They are double trouble. And they have always reminded me of that pair of velicoraptors that chase the kids through the kitchen at the end of Jurassic Park.

So when I made this comparison, my girls had no frame of reference. I mean. Jurassic Park was released before they were born. After a few adjustments to my netflix queue, we were ready to sit down and watch the movie.

Katie LOVED it. And it was just the beginning of our so called disaster flick marathon.

There was "Day after Tomorrow." Which led to many discussions on the "science" used by Hollywood. To does global warming = an ice age? To how cute Dennis Quaid and Jake Gyllenhaal are. Serious. And educational discussions.

"Deep Impact" was fun to watch.Especially after reading "Life as we Knew it" which tackled what would happen if a comet hit the moon.

With all of our volatile weather this spring...and Madalyn's new found terror over tornados...watching "Twister" was actually quite helpful. I could show Madalyn that there was no way we would have a tornado unless she saw a cow flying through the air.Fears totally abated. (Total trivia side note. Twister was the first movie released on dvd. You're welcome.)

And then there was "Independence Day." And now Katie can write a dissertation on the various ways that the Statue of Liberty can be destroyed at the movies.

So...what about you? Do you have a favorite disaster movie? Summer blockbuster? Popcorn movie?

Jane Austen, zombies, Bollywood, and a prize

The contest is over. Much later than I anticipated. Spring Break. Kids. Angiograms. Oh my! Anyway...the winner of the movie is Linda from Another Piece of the pie! Congrats! Email me your address and I'll get it right out to you!

I've admitted many times that I have not been able to get through a Jane Austen novel. I have tried. I love romance novels. And so many of them strive to emmulate the penultimate. Especially "Pride and Prejudice." But I just cannot force myself to slog through it. Everyone keeps saying to give it a chance. And I do. But my eyes glaze over. And I end up reading the same paragraph over and over. And I still have no idea as to what I have actually read.

However, I have read all of the incarnations. Watched the movies. Swooned over Colin Firth. Just like the lot of you.

And as a total side note...so many have read "Bridget Jones Diary" with it's own incarnation of Mr. Darcy. But not as many have read the sequel "The edge of Reason." Which in my opinion. Is even funnier. Including a pee in your pants funny interview between Bridget and Colin Firth.Mmmmm. Where were we?

It really is amazing. All of the inspirations that Jane Austen has given to pop culture. Including the most recent "Pride and Prejudice and Zombies." Which apparently, seemlessly introduces zombies. And ninjas. Into Austen's tale of manners. Who knew that "unmentionables" was code for Zombies?

Because I haven't read the zombie version yet...my favorite variation on Jane's classic is the musical "Bride and Prejudice." I believe it is quite the antithesis to zombies.

"Bride and Prejudice" transplants Austen's story from regency England to modern India. And uses the full tradition of the Bollywood musical. Including lush and colorful costumes. A scene in the rain and running through fountains. And of course...breaking into song in the middle of the market place.

The movie even has our very own Sayid from Lost. Naveen Andrews plays Mr. Balraj - or rather the Mr. Bingley role. But my very favorite character in the movie is that of Mr. Kholi - in the Mr. Collins role. In the Bollywood version, Mr. Kholi has come from "A-meer-ka" to find a bride. And after he is refused by Lalita (err...Elizabeth), he marries her best friend. After forcing allowing my kids to watch this movie over the weekend. They have taken to imitating Mr. Kholi. From going around saying "whazzz up?" to asking me how I like "their crib" or just random quotes like: "there is no life. Without wife." Complete with hand gestures. I challenge you to watch this movie and not start immitating Mr. Kholi's laugh.

And to complete this challenge. I'll even give you your very own copy of "Bride and Prejudice." (Random number generator will be employed. Contest ends Wednesday night. Just comment to enter)

So...what about you? Have you seen "Bride and Prejudice?" Do you have a favorite Jane Austen book or movie or variation? Will you read the zombie version?

Entertainment Weekly's New Movie Classics

This is a Movie meme I saw over on Firefly mom's site...here's how to play:

Copy and paste this list. If you’ve seen the movie, put the title in bold type.Put asterisks next to the movies you’ve seen and liked.Pretty simple, huh? But, naturally, I had to add editorial comments...and some questions at the end.

The following list comes from the current double issue of Entertainment Weekly in which they list the 100 best movies of the last 25 years (aka The New Classics).

1. Pulp Fiction 1994 * (I really liked this movie. I never thought that seeing someone shot in the head would be funny. But it was. Then again...you have to have a really warped sense of humor to like Quarantino.)
   
2. The Lord of the Rings trilogy 2001-03 ** (I could *NOT* get into the books at all. But the movies...loved 'em!)


3. Titanic 1997* (this was the first movie I saw after Katie was born - she was only a few weeks old. I was soooo hormonal...I think I cried buckets...)
   
4. Blue Velvet 1986 (quirky...and icky...but it really got me hooked on David Lynch)


5. Toy Story 1995 (my favorite Pixar - so fun - and not dumbed down - and stuff for the grown-ups too)


6. Saving Private Ryan 1998 (I have issues with blood and guts. Who would have guessed it from my comment on number one?! So...I've never seen this movie)
   
7. Hannah and Her Sisters 1986 (I love Woody Allen. But I think I prefer old school Woody Allen. Like "Purple Rose of Cairo" or "Sleeper" or even "Bananas" - but this one? Ehhh. And to think it's in the top 10. I don't get that.)


8. The Silence of the Lambs 1991**


9. Die Hard 1988** (Thus begins my affinity for all things Alan Rickman...)


10. Moulin Rouge 2001 (Yuck-a-roni -- why is this movie on this list at all?! Although it did have Ewan MacGregor. Yum. But...no thanks...)


11. This Is Spinal Tap 1984* (How can you not love the genius that is Christopher Guest?)


12. The Matrix 1999* (I love this movie. It's another one of those that if I find channel surfing, I must watch the rest. It was such an original premise. And we just started watching it with Katie. Her first rated R movie.)


13. GoodFellas 1990 * (I am such a fan of Ray Liotta. Genius movie)


14. Crumb 1995 (I had to look this one up on imdb. Never heard of it. And even then...ummm...has anyone who is not still living in their parent's basement ever seen this?)


15. Edward Scissorhands 1990 (I've seen it. But it was such a long time ago...I don't recall whether I liked it or not.)


16. Boogie Nights 1997 (Meh...Burt Reynolds, hot pants, and prosthetic man parts, oh my)


17. Jerry Maguire 1996* (back when Renee Zellweger looked normal. Why are her eyes so squinty now?)


18. Do the Right Thing 1989** (I like Spike Lee movies. There, I said it. I admit it. I really do. I don't think I've seen one that I didn't like.)


19. Casino Royale 2006 (It's in my netflix queue. Does that count?)


20. The Lion King 1994 *


21. Schindler’s List 1993* (I have only seen this movie once. In December 1993. I don't want to see it again. But I think everyone needs to see this movie.)


22. Rushmore 1998


23. Memento 2001* (What an interesting premise for a movie. You see the plot backwards. From the point of view of a man that has no long term memory. A true original. But...a top 100 classic?)


24. A Room With a View 1986** (I love, love, love this movie. Julian Sands. Helena Bonham Carter before she got quite strange. Italy. England. Manners. Full frontal male nudity. Gotta love it.)


25. Shrek 2001** (I love Disney. And this movie made me laugh so hard at all that is Disney...)


26. Hoop Dreams 1994


27. Aliens 1986 (When I was 10 I had a slumber party for my birthday. And invited 10 of my girlfriends over. And we watched a movie. "Alien." I would be raising hell if my daughter went to a birthday slumber party and that movie was playing. Shocking to think that my parents thought this was okay! And, yes, mom...just because I wanted to watch it does not mean you say "yes." So...nope, I haven't seen any of the sequels. And everytime my stomach hurts...I still think of the chest thing...)


28. Wings of Desire 1988 (never heard of it)


29. The Bourne Supremacy 2004* (I really liked the entire trilogy)


30. When Harry Met Sally… 1989* (There are so many great lines from this movie.


31. Brokeback Mountain 2005 * (It was a good movie. Gorgeous scenery. And incredibly depressing)


32. Fight Club 1999 (I read the book. Does that count?)
    
33. The Breakfast Club 1985** (The Brat pack at it's finest!)


34. Fargo 1996 * (Trivia: this is the only movie with a spouse directing spouse- and they both win Oscars. Eh?)


35. The Incredibles 2004* (Love Pixar. But, when you see this movie with a little person...it's a little long)


36. Spider-Man 2 2004* (My husband went as Doc Oct for Halloween. Made the costume himself. I'll have to see if I can find pictures...)


37. Pretty Woman 1990 **


38. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind 2004 (I hated this movie. My hubby thought it was genius.)


39. The Sixth Sense 1999 (I did not get the twist. And when they revealed the twist...WOW! Loved this movie.)


40. Speed 1994*
41. Dazed and Confused 1993


42. Clueless 1995* (There is one line in this movie that is so very funny. And one I quote quite often. When Cher is driving...she drives like a maniac. And she goes through a stop sign...and is reprimanded (by her friend?). Anyway...her response is: "I like totally paused." So...at every stop sign...I like. Totally. Pause. But...is this, like really a like top 50 movie?!


43. Gladiator 2000 ** (I was really apprehensive about seing this one. I've already told you my feelings about blood and gore. So, I made the mistake of asking the husband of a friend of mine who had seen it, how gory it was. He said it wasn't bad. So...we went to see it. Great movie. Great story. But the gore. Yuck. Had to shield my eyes more than once. My mistake? Asking a guy.)


44. The Player 1992 (I don't think I've seen this. But I am not positive. I like Altman. I like Tim Robbins. And the 47 other actors in this movie. But, I don't think I saw it.)


45. Rain Man 1988**


46. Children of Men 2006 (Another why is this here movie. It does have my boyfriend Clive Owen in it. It was an okay movie. Unless, like me, you've read the book. And it's resemblance is simply in minor plot points, character names, and title.)


47. Men in Black 1997**


48. Scarface 1983


49. Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon 2000


50. The Piano 1993 (This movie belongs in the ranks of "The English Patient" as one of the worst movies ever.)


51. There Will Be Blood 2007


52. The Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad 1988 (I have issues with Three Stooges type comedy. Sometimes. This was one of those times.)


53. The Truman Show 1998 **(This is such a sweet movie. And Ed Harris can be really sexy.)
    
54. Fatal Attraction 1987*


55. Risky Business 1983* (I won tickets to this from some local music video show.)


56. The Lives of Others 2006


57. There’s Something About Mary 1998 (Not my kind of movie. I just cringed the whole way through. And felt so sorry for Ben Stiller's character. Felt the same way about him in "Meet the Parents." Just made me feel embarrased for him.)


58. Ghostbusters 1984**


59. L.A. Confidential 1997


60. Scream 1996


61. Beverly Hills Cop 1984*


62. sex, lies and videotape 1989* (James Spader...)


63. Big 1988* (When I was younger...I wanted him to stay Big. And now...I have to tell him...go back, go back...)


64. No Country For Old Men 2007


65. Dirty Dancing 1987 ** (I saw this movie over and over again the summer before my senior year of high school.)


66. Natural Born Killers 1994 (Saw this with my hubby when we were dating. I think it was my punishment for taking him to see Four Weddings and A Funeral. Twice.)
    
67. Donnie Brasco 1997


68. Witness 1985 * (I still get chills even *thinking* about that Barn raising.)


69. All About My Mother 1999


70. Broadcast News 1987* (My favorite part of this movie was Albert Brooks. He just makes me laugh. Have you seen him in "Defending Your Life" with Meryl Streep? Hilarious. Not a top 100 movie...but a funny way to pass a few hours.)


71. Unforgiven 1992


72. Thelma & Louise 1991 ***** (Can you tell I *love* this movie? I think they made it across that canyon and went on to put men in their place for the rest of their lives. With Brad Pitt.)
    
73. Office Space 1999


74. Drugstore Cowboy 1989


75. Out of Africa 1985


76. The Departed 2006


77. Sid and Nancy 1986 (I rented this on a day that I stayed home "sick" in high school. Meh...)


78. Terminator 2: Judgment Day 1991*


79. Waiting for Guffman 1996


80. Michael Clayton 2007
    
81. Moonstruck 1987* (I liked the movie. But...Cher should have won her Oscar for "Mask" not this one...)


82. Lost in Translation 2003
    
83. Evil Dead 2: Dead by Dawn 1987 (Did you really think I might have seen this one?)


84. Sideways 2004


85. The 40 Year-Old Virgin 2005** (Steve Carell is just so funny. And I cannot think of waxing without thinking of him.)


86. Y Tu Mamá También 2002


87. Swingers 1996


88. Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery 1997


89. Breaking the Waves 1996


90. Napoleon Dynamite 2004 (I didn't bold this because I've never seen the whole thing. I know so many people who just *love* this movie. But...I don't get it. I didn't think it was funny at all. Maybe I am missing something. Someone, tell me, what am I missing?)
    
91. Back to the Future 1985*


92. Menace II Society 1993


93. Ed Wood 1994


94. Full Metal Jacket 1987


95. In the Mood for Love 2001 (And another one I had to look up. Still is not ringing a bell.)


96. Far From Heaven 2002 (Another one that is in my netflix queue)


97. Glory 1989** (Great movie. First time I saw Denzel in a movie. And I thought he played a different character than the one he did.)


98. The Talented Mr. Ripley 1999


99. The Blair Witch Project 1999


100. South Park: Bigger Longer & Uncut 1999 (My hubby is a huge South Park fan. And I must admit...it can be pretty funny. The episodes on Scientology and Tom Cruise are classic. But, I haven't seen the movie...)

I've only seen 59/100. I was a true movie junkie before kids. I'd be at the theatre the day movies were released. I had seen all the movies nominated for Oscars. And now. Not so much. I think this past year I had not only not seen any of the nominated movies...but I didn't want to see them.

It's always interesting to see what is not on a list. I cannot believe that "Shawshank Redemption" is not on this list. Or "Beauty and the Beast." Or "16 Candles." Or the first Indiana Jones movie. Or "Pirates of the Caribbean." What do you think is missing from this list? What did they get right? What absolutely, positively should NOT be there?

Thursday Thirteen: Independence Day

1996. It was the year I got married. It was the year they found the Unabomber. Bill Clinton began his second term of office. Atlanta held the Centennial Olympics. And the great movie "Independence Day" was released. If I am ever channel surfing and find this movie...I have to stop and watch. Have to.

So...as I was trying to figure out what to do today...I ran across this fabulous site listing all the things that could be learned from the movie "Independence Day." So, I offer many, many thanks to Dean Kanipe for allowing me to plagarize borrow some items from his work of genius:

1. Aliens like to blow up significant land marks first. Apparently the best way to destroy a city is to position your "Death Ray" over the most recognizable building.

2. If alien "Destroyers" come to your city to blast it into oblivion and you are caught in traffic at the last minute, make sure that you are travelling with a dog and a small child. The Law of Averages says you'll survive the Death Ray.

3. If alien "Destroyers" come to your city to blast it into oblivion and you are caught in traffic at the last minute, make sure that you are NOT a raspy-voiced homosexual cable TV executive. The Law of Averages says you'll get waxxed by the Death Ray.

4. NASA sends out rejection letters, just like Harvard.

5. A fleet of RVs can travel across the Nevada Test Site in line-abreast formation without the need of roads, thanks to the imense expanses of Salt Flats and the lack of impeding mountains.

6. Area 51 has a big chain-link fence around it, and the guards at the gate wear black combat fatigues with white metal helmets in 120 degree heat.

7. Standard operating procedure for the Air Force is to cluster all vehicles, aircraft, and ground personel on a 200 meter section of tarmac in the middle of an Alien Invasion.

8. Any bonehead with rudimentary aviation experience can be taught to pilot an F-18 in 5 hours.

9. Any bonehead with F-18 flight experience can learn to pilot an Alien fighter in 5 minutes.

10. If you're President and your administration is faltering and an Alien Invasion occurs, relocate the V.P., the Cabinet, and the Joint Chiefs to one centralized location so that the Aliens can take them all out with one shot. You can always blame the problems of the past on them after victory is achieved.

11. In 10 hours, one man with a Macintosh Laptop can code a virus in C++ that will take down a completely alien computer system.

12. Even though the Mac isn't compatible with most other Earthly operating systems, it can interface with an alien computer.

13. Alien network security is nonexistant.

Copyright © 1996, Dean Kanipe, 626 West Club Blvd, Durham, NC 27701. May be reproduced on the internet for personal use only. Any reproduction in print or in any fixed or for-profit medium is not allowed without written permission. Whenever this document is copied, this copyright statement must remain attached.

Ten on Tuesday: Favorite Movie Comedies

Today's topic for the Ten on Tuesday meme is my top ten favorite movie comedies. This was a really hard list to make. And I am sure that I am leaving out lots. Probably even a favorite. But my brain cells are gone. I have two children.

Here are my favs...in no particular order:

1. Thank You For Smoking – This is a hilarious movie. If you haven’t seen it already (because you haven’t followed previous “orders” to watch it) – put it in your netflix queue. The movie is about Nick Naylor, a spokesman for Big Tobacco, who is trying to the positive spin on smoking. He even goes to LA to convince an agent (played by Rob Lowe) to have more actors smoke in movies – “like the good old days.” He meets weekly with the MOD squad (merchants of death) – who represent the alcohol lobby and the gun lobby. This ingenious movie is all in the details – like Nick’s son goes to St. Euthanasius. Again…go watch this movie!

2. 50 First Dates – I love this movie. It is both sweet and funny – a true date movie! Every time I run across it on TV, I have to stop and watch. Drew Barrymore and Adam Sandler have great chemistry – and it’s too bad that Drew starred with Jimmy Fallon instead of Adam Sandler in the very boring “Fever Pitch.”

3. Sixteen Candles – A classic! “Now we are both on the Pill.” “You own a church?” “No more yankie my wankie.” Ahhh…the memories. Can you believe that this movie was made 24 years ago??

4. CSA – I think this is another movie (besides “Thank you for Smoking”) that I am the only one that has seen it! It’s a mockumentary about the CSA (confederate states of America) – as if the South had won the “war of Northern Aggression.” It is a very clever and intelligent comedy produced by Spike Lee. Some of the best parts are the commercials (the “documentary” is being shown for the first time on CSA television).

5. Princess Bride – Another classic. Who hasn’t seen this movie? And one of the best movies to quote from.

6. Monty Python and the Holy Grail – This needs no commentary :-)

7. Best in Show/Mighty Wind – Christopher Guest is just brilliant. I think I am discovering my love for the mockumentary.

8. Blazing Saddles/Young Frankenstein – Can you believe that Mel Brooks released BOTH of these movies in the same year?

9. 40 Year Old Virgin/Knocked Up/Superbad – Superbad is not nearly as good as the first two…but the whole McLovin plot line wins me over. Puerile humor at its best.

10. Elf/A Christmas Story – My favorite Christmas movies. Elf made Will Ferrell movies “must sees.” And Elf is the first time I heard the word “ginormous.” It is now part of my lexicon. And “A Christmas Story.” My dad had a book by Jean Shepherd…so I had already read it before I saw it. Did you know that there is a “shrine” to this movie in Cleveland, Ohio? You can tour the house year round. And this year is the 25th anniversary for the movie. “It was…it was…soap poisoning…”