Just like waterboarding

There exists in this world many forms of torture. And torture devices. Human beings can get quite creative. There are thumbscrews.The infamous rack.

An Iron Maiden. Does listening to the band Iron Maiden count as torture as well?

And now, I would like to submit the latest method of torture. It's called a table. With an attached stool.

I sit in this particular torture device for an hour each month during my PTA Board meeting. And when the meeting is over, I attempt to stand. I try to haul myself to my feet. But, my rear has turned to lead. And my legs start to tingle and burn as the blood trys to circulate. My knees have locked into a position that prohibits standing when they were shoved under this table. And those said knees are having alignment issues with my hips, which are precariously floating around the stool. Because you see this stool.And how (not) wide that seat is?

Well, I won't torture you with a companion photo of my derriere, but let's just say a stool for each cheek might be sufficient.

The table and attached stool may be a lovely seat for my seven year old, but for me...not so much.

And then, to prove that I am a glutton for punishment, I stayed at my torture stool. AND had lunch with Madalyn. In the school cafeteria.

It's a pretty special ocassion to have a parent come to lunch. We get to sit at a special table. And when the monitors are telling the kids to be quiet - those of us at the special table can ignore them. Best of all, Madalyn got to invite a friend to eat with her at the torture special table.Here is Madalyn's lunch. Apples. Sun chips. Chocolate milk. And grilled cheese. What? What's that? Are you asking where IS that grilled cheese? It's sealed in a plastic pouch. See - over on the right side of her tray. Really. They don't make the grilled cheese at the school. It comes in all it's prepackaged goodness.

Another bonus for parent lunches. I buy ice cream.

Yeah. Let's NOT do a name that photo contest with this one.

And when lunch was over, I inched my knees out from under the table. Rubbed my legs to get the circulation going. Pinched my hips to remind them that they were still attached. Stomped my feet to be sure that I could feel them. Made sure that I had everyone's attention while I hauled my tush off the round stool. And I finally stood up. And seriously wondered if the CIA had started investigating the possibilities to be found at my local elementary school.

So, what about you? Did you find school lunches to be yummy or pure torture? Do you partake of school lunches now? Volunteer at school? Participate in any other forms of torture?

Theme song: Sting - King of Pain

Week in Review: Week 3

Another week breezed by here at casa Sunshine and Lemonade. A week without too much drama. Which is surprising. Especially since my children live here. But I'll take it. Anytime.

Last Friday, Madalyn brought home her work from the week in her Friday Folder. They had been taking timed tests in math - to work on their 0-5 math facts. She got a 92% on addition. And a 53% on subtraction. I asked her what happened with subtraction (she got that low because she didn't finish most of the page, not that they were wrong) - and she says "Well, mom. Subtraction is just not my thing." So...can you see her now? In high school. Telling her math teacher - "yeah, subtraction is not my thing. But I can do a mean quadratic equation."

On Tuesday, Katie went to a homeschool cooking class at our local Young Chef's Academy. There were 19 kids there. I don't think they were expecting quite so many! It was an hour and a half class (or a little less for us because I thought it started at 11:30 rather than 11) - so I got a little time alone - and Katie got to cook a breakfast burito and blueberry muffins - and most importantly, she got to eat them. The classes are only once a month, so she'll have to make do with cooking in our kitchen until the next time.

And then last night after dinner, the girls presented me with this:

The good mother award. I am not sure what I did to spurn this creativity. Oh, wait, yes, I do know. They lost all privileges yesterday - so perhaps this was their way of entertaining themselves. Hmmm...maybe instead of asking what I did...I should be wondering what they did. And why are they trying to butter me up? Aren't they sweet?

This is what we accomplished homeschooling:

GRAMMAR/WRITING: I did what I said I would do. We stopped the Note taking workbook and I got a vocabulary program. We started Wordly Wise.I really like it. And after a week, she has learned new words. And how to use them. And I think she'll retain it. It's very challenging - which is just what she needs. Also, I have made writing for her blog part of her school work. She got a blog back in February and I let her write what she wanted. Most days it was text speak and craziness. And then she let it fall by the wayside. I told her that if she really wanted to be a writer, then she needed to write. Go check out her blog.

LOGIC: We are continuing through the workbook and this week has mostly been analogies. Did you know that they took those off the SAT? Anyway, today she had to make up her own. She was provided with the first part - and had to do the second. For example: sour is to pickle as _______ is to __________. So she did sweet to molasses. My favorite one was this one: net is to fisherman as guillotine is to executioner. She can be a bloodthirsty one.

GEOGRAPHY: This week we started studying China. I meant to do this first. To go hand in hand with the Olympics, but it just didn't happen that way. She read a book about China - and some articles from a DK encyclopedia about the country. And we finally used our Geography through Art book. To make it so that I didn't have to be the crafty one - I just told her to pick what she wanted to do out of the China section. And she chose to make a paper cut out. She did a great job with her dragon:

HISTORY: We continued along with History Odyssey, this week studying the Akkadians, Sumerians, and Mesopotamia. I made her watch a "They Might be Giants" video. And now she can't get the song out of her head.

I thought it was pretty funny...

BIOLOGY: We moved from the microscope to the Science encyclopedia - and learned about the taxonomic binomial system of organizing living things. And we have talked about the parts of an animal cell. Today were were supposed to capture an ant and look at it under the microscope. Michael made our slide to trap the ant. But he used corrugated cardboard. So, the ants keep escaping. He needs to re-engineer it!

MATH: We finished up our chapter on rate.

So, that was our week. There is that old saying of "you learn something new everyday." What did you learn this week?

Week in Review

Another week of ordinary. And I am quite happy with ordinary. Boring. Mundane. All those are good words here at casa Sunshine and Lemonade. Because they don’t involve drama. Now, we did start our week off with a little excitement.

Last Friday, Madalyn finally got to celebrate her birthday (because, you know, celebrating on a cruise ship is just not enough.) with her friends. With a slumber party. How is it possible for four little girls to be so loud? Or so messy? Is there a genetic advantage for the decibel level that girls can attain? They played. They ate pizza. They opened presents. They had cupcakes. There was a smidge of angst regarding missing mommies…and headaches about said decibel levels…but they were over it rather quickly. Somehow, they managed to tuck themselves into bed and fall asleep around midnight. And then on Saturday morning, we were ordered to wake up and fix them donuts. Ahhh…round two of sugar. And then we sent them home. And took a nap. Aren’t they cuties?

And here they are showing off their ability to make armpit farts. And the same noise with their legs. Let me now destroy the myth that only boys are fascinated with bodily functions. A mother's pride and joy.

This week was Teacher Appreciation week at Madalyn’s school. The room mom’s arranged for some pretty nice things. They did a fruit basket on Monday – every student was to bring in a piece of fruit for the basket. I wonder if they needed more than one. Then on Tuesday, Madalyn and I each wrote a note of thanks to her teacher. I got the cards at Target. They cost $500. I almost couldn’t fit the kids in the car after that trip. Yeah, don't ask. But, Mrs. Murphy, you are worth it! She also got a pen bouquet, lunch from her favorite restaurant…and then tonight a bunch of us moms made her dinner. I was in charge of dessert. And for some reason, I forgot to take pictures of making the éclair cake. I had to make two, you know. I would not win mother of the year if I didn’t have one for us as well. Not that I’ll even be considered for mother of the year. I might be my children’s favorite mother though if I make it again for my blog. For my readers. All three of you. Oh, the sacrifices.

Oh, yeah…the point of this? Our homeschool week in review:

Math: It was all review this week. Kind of a math holiday for mom. I didn’t have to remind myself on how to do math. And constantly remind myself that I am not smarter than a 5^th grader.

History: Katie finished Chapter 36 from last week. She read the Kids Discover Magazine on the Civil Rights movement and she read Cobblestone’s “Get on the Bus” issue. Then we did part of chapter 37 (yep, we skipped a section) on the Vietnam War. And then moved onto chapter 38 covering the Soviet invasions of Czechoslovakia and Afghanistan.

Grammar: Katie is still in chapter 7, covering prepositional phrases, conjunctions, and interjections. She is still not a fan of grammar…but she obviously tries to have fun with it as evidenced by some of the sentences she creates. For example, one of her assignments gives her a base sentence and she is to add a prepositional phrase to give it more detail. For example: The boy raked leaves. When you add the phrase, it could read: The boy with brown hair raked leaves or The boy raked leaves into a pile. So…what did Katie create?

Base: Kerry and I sat. Katie’s addition: Kerry and I sat near your yak.

Base: Children play. Katie’s addition: Children play in a volcano.

Base: The street was filled. Katie’s addition: The street was filled with many ostriches.

Base: Birds fly. Katie’s addition: Birds fly to their death.

The mind of a ten year old.

Report writing workbook/Research project: Katie chose her first lady: Jacqueline Kennedy and has begun her research. We got a little waylaid as the books haven’t arrived at the library yet…so some things have been postponed until next week. (Ahhh…the disappointment) Katie learned how to make a bibliography, how to take notes using note cards…and did the first part of her research using the internet. In her search, she found this fun site (no help with the project…but fun) where you can dress paper dolls from history including Jackie O, Hillary Clinton, Mr. Darcy and even Alexander the Great (did you know he wore underwear?).

Piano—Again, I have no idea. I don’t play. I don’t sing. I don’t read music. So…I have to ask Katie what she did. And here is what she said: She is learning how to stop boinging. Is that the technical term? It means that she needs to stop playing staccato when she is supposed to play legato. Uh-huh. And to make it more difficult, she has a piece this week where she is supposed to boing. Okey dokey.

There you have it. I hope you all had a great week. Full of mundane and boring. Sans drama.

Week in Review

After a week of vacation, it’s always an adjustment to get back into the swing of things. On Monday, I dropped Madalyn off at school and then Katie and I headed to my water aerobics class. Katie had read some of my blogging about the class and she was anxious to see me lapped by old ladies. It wasn’t exactly what she thought it would be. She thought we’d all be swimming laps. I think not.

Madalyn had a week long project to do for homework. Every morning her class recites the pledge of allegiance – and her project was to look up some of the words from the pledge in the dictionary – and then explain them in her own words. Words like republic, nation, indivisible, and liberty. Somewhat challenging for a 6 year old. Errr 7 year old. Or so I thought. Until she told me that all this homework was discombobulating her. Hearing your 7 year old say “discombobulating” is disconcerting.

On Thursday, Katie and I had our classes through the homeschool group. I was able to award one of my students with the Gold award (summa cum laude) for his National Latin Exam. He only missed one question out of the 40 on the test. I am so very proud!

Thursday was also Madalyn’s birthday. She decided that we needed to have Mexican for dinner. Mexican should have been listed as one of her favorite things yesterday! She opted to not have dessert at the restaurant so that we could get home faster. So she could open presents. It was the night of Pokemon. We are planning to have a slumber party for her birthday…but probably not until next month. A house full of the high decibel level of little girls. Good times.

Homeschooling Week in review:

Math: Katie finished Singapore 5A…and we started 5B. It’s going quite well so far…she is flying through…doing the first 8 workbook sections this week alone. She is looking at how to multiply and divide with decimals. She hasn’t needed my help yet.

History: Before vacation, we spent about 2 weeks studying World War II – and over the break, Katie started reading Anne Frank’s “Diary of a Young Girl.” In order to attempt to finish Story of the World by the end of the year, we are going to be skipping some of the sections. This week we moved on to chapter 30 with the formation of Israel; and then onto chapter 31 and the Marshall Plan.

Physics: Katie completed Physics right before Spring break…so we are done with science until we begin our four year cycle again in the fall with Biology. We are going to continue to use Noeo for the science curriculum.

Spelling/Grammar: Now that Physics is off her plate, I am no longer dividing the week between these two subjects…but she will do both each day to complete the books. Spelling will completed next week – and Katie is thrilled! We still have a bit more to do with grammar. The grammar lesson today focuses on one of my big pet peeves – good vs. well.

Writing: Katie is still reading Anne Frank – and we will be discussing it at the end of next week. Katie has had many vocabulary questions from this book – and a lot of time looking up things in the dictionary (I appear to be her personal dictionary).

Piano: Because Katie did not practice on the cruise...her lesson this week was almost like a practice session. But with a teacher making sure that her form was correct.

Latin: This week Katie learned about how to tell the difference between 3rd, 3rd -io, and 4th conjugation verbs.

Week in Review

Our week started on an expensive note – with our trip to American Girl – and continued on that same path through the week. On Tuesday, Katie and I had an appointment at Dinner Afare – and we made 12 dinners in about an hour and a half. We really had fun – and I was thinking that if she helped me to put things together she might actually try some of the dinners we were making. The only thing that she really turned her nose up at was Polynesian chicken – for some reason she has a prejudice against pineapple. She is quite intrigued by the pork mole wraps that we made (with the combo of tomato sauce, peanut butter, and cocoa!). Last night we ate one of our meals – beef stroganoff. Yum! We have our freezer full with the rest of the dinners. I am not sure how people manage to store what they make – we have the unique situation of having 3 refridgerators AND a chest freezer. Don’t ask.

Let’s see…Wednesday was pretty uneventful…we came in third place for trivia. It is rather difficult to split $10 between 6 people.

Thursday we have our homeschool group. Katie took the National Latin exam – as did my students. The teacher is not allowed to proctor the exam – so I got to sit around and chat with the other moms. Thursday afternoon I tutored a boy in our neighborhood for the National Latin exam he is taking today at his high school. It was pretty difficult to tutor him as he wasn’t having that much trouble with the grammar – but with the culture, mythology, and geography questions. His high school uses the Cambridge Latin program – which is a series of stories about a family living in Roman Britain. So – when there are questions on the NLE about the Roman Empire and Cincinnatus and Orpheus and Carthage, he was somewhat at a loss. And I was somewhat at a loss as to teach him these things the day before the exam.

Madalyn had a “fun run” at school on Thursday to help raise money for a new gym floor. She really wanted me to come and watch – but the timing did not work with our class obligations. She informed me that no one else’s mom has to work on Thursday mornings!

My big event was the arrival of the packages. The curriculum for next year keeps coming! I still am not sure about history – but I think I have ordered all the books that we might need for any program that we decide to go with! At the moment, I am leaning towards a cannibalized version of History Odyssey and Story of the World – with a weekly History through Art via History at Our House. Maybe.

I also finished perusing the Rainbow Resouces catalog. All 87 pounds of it. I have so many things circled or marked that we will either need to win the lottery or rob a bank to get a fraction of it. I am so enamored by those of you doing the “green hour nature challenge” that I might get guides and journals to go along with that. And I am even thinking about an Art with the masters course. Perhaps I need to grasp the reality that I like to buy and collect curriculum. I am certainly not going on a nature walk. And I have no artistic abilities and I hate crafts. What am I thinking?

The girls got a package too - from Cindy in Texas (their fairy godmother). It came complete with Christmas card and letter and a footprint on the envelope! The girls opened the box which was a Schwan's meat box. I said "yippee...meat!" The girls were not amused. They could not believe that their fairy godmother would send meat! As a gift. Finally Katie suggested that Cindy might have just used the box and there might be something else in there. Madalyn went to get some scissors, but Katie got the box open on her own...so naturally Madalyn ran to put the scissors away with all of us yelling "doooonnnn'tttt run with scissors!" The girls got beautiful flower and ribbon garlands. Madalyn decided to wear hers to school today for Relay for Life hat day.

And then another package arrived. Photoshop. I might need an intervention. Look at how thick that book is. Don’t think I am going to be reading it. Pioneer woman better get her photoshop blog up and running soon so that I can figure out how to make my pictures beautiful.

Today we spent our morning at the orthopedists. Katie has scoliosis – and has been wearing a back brace for almost 2 years. (She doesn’t like anyone to know – don’t tell her I told you!) Every four months we go to get x-rays to make sure that things are stabilized – and they are. Katie wore my favorite t-shirt today.

Do you know what today is?? It’s pi day and talk like a physicist day. I had no idea it was talk like a physicist day (in honor of Einstein’s birthday). My husband is going to practice his Stephen Hawking imitation – he says that will be easier than a German accent. There is even a website for the occasion. And t-shirts! Gotta love nerdy t-shirts.

Okay, okay…I am supposed to be telling you about our homeschool progress for the week. So here goes:

Math: Katie learned about ratios. She says “the easiness is killing me!”

History: Completed SOTW chapter 26 on the Great Depression and the rise of Hitler. Yesterday she read several articles in Cobblestone magazine about the depression and today she started a biography on Eleanor Roosevelt.

Physics: Katie continued with Noeo and studying about magnetism and electro magnets. This week she moved on to how magnets are used in microphones and in recordings.

Spelling and Grammar: She did a review chapter in Spelling workout and for grammar she worked on the different types of letters.

Writing: I finally finished “Animal Farm.” I really liked it. We did our “deconstructing” talk about it (hey…did you all see that Larry Goldstone posted on my blog? I am so important!) and delved into the meaning behind the story. After much discussion, Katie says that you have to stand up for what you believe is right, even if you are scared. We also discussed the similarities between “Animal Farm” and “The Wave” and how they relate to what was happening in Germany that allowed Hitler to have so much power. This is the reason that I love homeschooling. I love that it allows us to cross reference so to speak – that our lesson interrelate and build upon one another. Katie also started reading “Esperanza rising.”

Piano: Her teacher says that she is really challenging her with the pieces she is working on. She is practicing how to roll her wrists without moving her arms or shoulders. I am not sure that I understand the purpose of this exercise – but her teacher seems enthusiastic about the process!

Week in Review

My quest for a history curriculum continued this week – and I still haven’t made any decisions. We did register for Art through History through History at Our house. I am hoping by sticking our toes in the water, we can get a feel for the style of this program to see if might be a fit. A lot of the curriculum that I ordered for next year arrived. I love getting boxes! I got what we needed for Noeo Bio II, Singapore 6A and B (but for some reason, I forgot to order the workbooks!), some miscellaneous books for history, and a new typing program for Katie to use. One of the sources I used was Rainbow resources…and I got a copy of their catalog with my order. That book must weigh 87 pounds…and would surely harm a small child should it fall off my counter or unexpectedly fling from my hands while being interrupted for the millionth time with cries of “she did…”

My book reading time this week has been somewhat limited as I found a new obsession: Pioneer Woman. It all started with a picture of Apple dumplings over on Jeanne’s blog. It’s all her fault. The pictures are beautiful and mouth watering. I found the recipe over on Pioneer woman cooks…and I rushed to Target to buy the ingredients. (The kids are making them tonight – I’ll tempt you with the results tomorrow!) Then I spent the rest of the day on Confessions of a Pioneer woman…reading her love story…looking at her amazing photography…and wishing (for only about 5 minutes) that I lived on a ranch. Eventually the pleas of my children were heard and I went back to my own reality. I told the kids it was Jeanne’s fault. It’s also Jeanne’s fault that I sent the link to my friend Cindy in Texas. She is currently obsessing about cowboys and apple dumplings too…and so standardized math test questions are no longer being written and her house is being taken over by the cats.

Madalyn had a good week at her school. She had a project this week to make a poster showing how to keep your teeth clean and healthy. Here is a picture of her making the poster.

I am on the PTA of Madalyn’s school. I keep track of all the volunteer hours (basically it means that I read code – I have to figure out parent’s John Hancock’s…and then figure out what class their child is in…and then log the volunteer hours per class. It also involves a lot of hair pulling and gnashing of teeth). This week we had our monthly PTA meeting. We sit at tables with attached stools. That are made for 6 year olds. Not for thirty-somethings whose rears are much too large for said stools. My feet were asleep within a few minutes. And then because it’s fun…I stayed and had lunch with Madalyn…eating school food…AND sitting for another half hour on those stools. I am still recovering.

MATH: Katie spent the first part of the week doing chapter reviews about division and multiplication of fractions. Then on Wednesday we moved to “Areas of Triangles” and learned the simple formula: ½ x base x height. Next week we will begin covering ratios. Katie looked at the upcoming chapter this morning and said “are we really going to spend time with this chapter?”

HISTORY: Katie finished reading “The Wave” and said next to “Ties that Bind, Ties that Break,” it was her favorite required reading for school. I told her about watching it as an afterschool movie when I was in elementary school. She is most upset that we cannot get it on dvd. We began and finished chapter 25 covering Japan in Manchuria and The Long March. Tonight we are going to play go-fish with “economic” sanctions. When Japan invaded Manchuria, the League of Nations imposed economic sanctions (meaning no trade with member nations and Japan) until they withdrew their troops. The problem was that Japan’s biggest trading partner was the US…who was not a member of the League of Nations. With Go-fish, there will be four players: Japan, the US, and 2 league of Nations members. Japan can only trade with the US. The US can trade with anyone. The league of Nations countries can only trade with the US and other League members. We’ll see if the girls still think that “go fish” is fun after our experiment!

PHYSICS: Katie continued with week 25 of the Noeo Physics curriculum and learning about Magnetism. She continued to learn about electro-magnetism and learned how to make a compass – and then how to make the compass point at an electrically charged current rather than north. Again…I am obsessed with LOST…among other things…maybe by studying Noeo Physics, I’ll figure out what the islands secrets are…

SPELLING/GRAMMAR: In Grammar, Katie worked on adjectives and began looking at formatting letters (does anyone actually write those anymore?); in Spelling, she continued working with suffixes.

WRITING: Katie read “Animal Farm” this week – and actually finished today – a little earlier than I expected. I had her read this not only because it correlates with our history, but because I read the book “Deconstructing Penguins” which labeled this as a fourth grade book. I loved their discussion of the meanings of this book and I cannot wait to discuss it with her next week. (Hey…did any of you notice that the author of this book posted on my blog?!! He commented after my post about the book – and how I felt like a moron after reading it. At least he didn’t offer the advice of my friend Cindy – which was to simply to take my kids to see “Horton Hears a Who” and call it a day.) Katie said she liked the book – but not as much as some. She says the pictures are gross and give her a stomach ache. I am reading too (but I am not done yet because I’ve been blogging…and obsessing) and I must admit, she’s right…the pictures are nasty.PIANO: Katie is working on sheet music and experimenting with a piece that she can play with different notes (I have no idea as to what that means…it’s her word…of course, when I first asked what she learned in piano this week, she said “stuff.”).

OTHER STUFF: Our homeschool group started back again this week. Katie started swimming lessons there. She is a good swimmer – but could use some fine tuning on her strokes (umm…someone needs to show her what they are). Her friend Diana joined our group and is in class with her. She also went back to folk dancing. Her other class is Latin (with Abbeyj) and they reviewed to get ready for the National Latin exam next week.

Be sure that your child gets some socialization...

For some, when they hear that we homeschool, they become quite concerned about my daughters social activities. I am not sure why they think that we are tucked away in our house, never to see the light of day or another 10 year old soul. I'll tell you, the word homeschooler is an oxymoron...we are never home. Maybe we should be called carschoolers as I think that is where a lot of "school" work gets accomplished. We drive to choir...to piano lessons...to scouts...to soccer practice...to gymnastics...to our homeschool group's classes...to park days...to the library...to playdates with friends...and I am sure that there are a million more places that are part of our weekly agenda. I think that as "car schoolers" we have more opportunities to socialize than if she was in a class room all day where she would get into trouble for socializing.

Our journey to homeschooling was not an easy one. It is not something that I even wanted to do. I was really looking forward to the day when both of my children would be in school and I would have a little "me" time. HA! Katie attended kindergarten through a church program...and I was desperate to find a place for her to go. I was trying to do all I could to avoid the homeschooling option. And then...someone let me borrow their copy of "The Well Trained Mind" by Susan Wise Bauer. I read that book from cover to cover...ordered my own copy...and KNEW that homeschooling was something that I could do. My degrees are in Anthropology and History...so the program really spoke to me.

After I had made my decision to homeschool, I found out about a magnet school in our county that took children from out of the area (the spots were awarded by lottery). It was a great program, so I arranged to go on a tour. I was very impressed...but when I asked how they would handle my daughter - who before kindergarten was reading novels and making up algebraic equations for fun...I was told that she would probably have to follow what the class was doing, or do some independent study. Well...that sealed the deal for me...I could do that at home...and let her progress at the rate she needed.

We are now in our fourth year of homeschooling...and now the question we get is...why do you homeschool one and not the other? That is an easy one...every child is different...with different needs. Katie needs to be at home...Madalyn needs to be at school...everyone is happy...and everyone is learning!